Forged in Fire

As promised in last week’s installment here on Forged in Fire, I intend to take the next few weeks sharing some random yet incredibly influential stories that play a role in the overall story of this life I’ve lived up to this point.

Nailing down specific stories can be hard. Particularly when looking at 25 years of life from a broad lens.

That said, I was able to drum up a few that struck the perfect balance between compelling and share-worthy. 

So, without further ado, here goes nothing.

---

As a high school senior, I was pretty certain that I had life by the “you know what’s.” I had it all figured out, or so I thought.

Spoiler Alert: I didn’t.

I was naive. The weight of reality hadn’t yet hit me. 

All at once I was certain that I had my future mapped out, while simultaneously possessing not the slightest clue what lay ahead.

In hindsight, I knew virtually nothing and stood for nothing, aside from one lingering dream that hung over my head: I wanted to graduate from a four-year university. That was it, that was the dream. A dream that I carried with me and stood behind in even some of my darkest moments of which there were a few.

We all go through some, don’t we? Some low points? Times that nothing seems to go “our way.” Scenarios that have us up against it, so to speak. 

While it’s never ideal to experience hardships of any kind, they often produce one heck of a story on the back end.

This one is no exception.

To fast forward in time, from a high school senior, to a college sophomore – I was at a major crossroads. Within a year’s time, I had lost my father, changed major’s three times and hung up the sport of wrestling for good. Oh, and failed a couple of courses along the way. 

I was on the brink of flunking out of the only thing keeping my head above water which was the goal I’d set for myself to obtain a bachelor’s degree. 

One specific moment in time that will forever etched into my mind, and perfectly encapsulates just how low I truly was at this stage in my life was a Thursday morning in the middle of December, 2018 – the week leading up to Christmas.

I had one final exam left to take before heading back to my hometown for the holidays. 

A final exam that (literally) would determine my ability to maintain enrollment.

The test was first thing in the morning, 8:00 am. I woke up early, loaded up my 2004 Chevrolet Monte Carlo and made my way toward campus. I needed gas, and I was hungry.

Still as clear as day, I remember walking into a gas station to check my account balance at the ATM.

$19.84.

Eighteen dollars in gas, and enough leftover for a small black coffee and a glazed doughnut.

Onto my final exam I went, with an empty bank account and a mind filled with worry. If I didn’t pass this very test, I wouldn’t pass the class – my time in Ames, Iowa would be over.

Sitting in a large lecture hall, I used up every last moment that I was allowed in order to complete the exam before turning it in and going on my way. I was almost certain that I hadn’t scored high enough to pass.

My walk back to my car and the 3-hour drive thereafter possessed no shortage of reflection. “How have I gotten here? What could I do to turn things around? What would happen if I had just failed the test?”

In a pool of my own thoughts, many of which not positive in nature and riddled with self-doubt, I was forced to play the waiting game.

---

Now, if you know anything about my story at large, you know that I must’ve passed the exam.

I did, by the skin of my teeth – just enough to keep me going – just enough to keep my dream alive.

What this story provides, at the very least for me in times of deep-thought, is incredible perspective. In times when I take things for granted, I think back on that very moment in time, when I had, quite literally, nothing but a dream of graduating with a bachelor’s degree. No sense of direction or strong concept of how I’d find my way out of the hole I’d dug.

The story itself is a reminder of how far I’ve come and highlights the importance of perseverance. When I’m down on myself in my current state, it doesn’t take long to recall that if I navigated the maze of life laid out for me all those years ago, with nothing but a dream, then I’m more than capable of anything my mind is set to with all that I am fortunate enough to have now (and by the way – so are you.)

---

Thank you for taking the time to read. If you enjoyed my writing, you can subscribe to future posts by using the field below!

---

Any donation would also be very much appreciated! Funds will go directly toward growing the Forged in Fire outreach in our efforts to share our mission with others. Thank you kindly in advance!